| 7.9.02 |
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What is friendship, really? Is it ultimately selfish, or selfless? Perhaps it is the combination of the two. I believe the healthiest of relationships have mastered the balance of (charitably) giving and (humbly) receiving.
I have spent the last two days giving many of my resources to others. I have spent money that rightly belongs to my creditors. I have given presents. I have used my car. I have given time. And I have given my heart. Sometimes I feel cursed by my own generous heart, but then, now, I am consumed with guilt for an expectation of reception I have not gained. Am I wrong to expect?
In Washington, and perhaps elsewhere, though I have not noted it, there is an attitude of selfishness. I worry that I am falling prey to it as well. Jobs come and go. The weather comes and goes. People are transient. My heart longs for stable love.
I am looking at my neighbors. A nice, childless, older couple. I watch her cook him food, and I watch them spend time together on the sunporch. Is she satisfied with him as her companion? I am sadened by the thought of one person being my soul companion, and yet, I feel that is what I deeply desire.
Does this make even an ounce of sense? I must depart to celebrate the birthday of a friend. |
| posted by Paige @ 3:58 PM |
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